CHABINGA STILL HOLDING ON: PF DUMPS HIM, BUT HE REFUSES TO LET GO
— A Satirical Look at Political Heartbreak
Lusaka | May 1, 2025 | The FOX Newspaper
In what can only be described as a classic case of “She’s moved on, bro”, Hon. Robert Chabinga publicly refuses to accept his expulsion from what he insists is his Patriotic Front (PF). Think of it like this: the PF leaves the relationship, blocks his number, changes the locks, and posts couple pics with a new bae — Raphael Nakachinda — but Chabinga is still standing in the rain with flowers shouting, “We belong together!”
In a bold and passionately-worded “I’m still the one” statement, Chabinga outlines why he believes Nakachinda’s appointment as Secretary General is invalid. He cites “illegitimate authority,” “lack of consultation,” and “constitutional non-compliance” — or as a heartbroken lover would put it: “He didn’t even ask for permission to date her!”
He further dismisses his own expulsion as “laughable,” which is exactly what your friends say when you tell them your ex didn’t really mean it when they said it’s over. He also throws in some good ol’ legal talk, declaring Nakachinda’s appointment “null and void,” like an expired love letter that’s no longer romantic — just sad.
“Mr. Morgan Ngona is still the Secretary General,” Chabinga insists, clutching onto the party’s past like an old mixtape. Meanwhile, the rest of the PF seems to have hit ‘unfollow’ and moved on with someone new.
In closing, Chabinga — still styling himself as Acting President of PF — calls on “loyalists” to stand firm, which is political speak for “text your ex, maybe they’ll change their mind.”
The Verdict?
It’s giving: “If I can’t have you, no one can.”
But the party seems to have said: “New chapter. New man. Bye.”
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CHABINGA STILL HOLDING ON: PF DUMPS HIM, BUT HE REFUSES TO LET GO
